I have this “friend”. She is from my college days and lives near me. We only see each other a couple of times per year. She drops off the face of the earth for a while and then I contact her and we have dinner, and then no contact for months…I am always (almost always) the one to make contact…but she e-mailed me out of the blue yesterday — because, yes, she wants something. She and her husband are going to France for a wedding and they would like to stay with my parents for a few days. Whatever. She asked me how I was doing (she knows I am TTC) and so I briefly wrote back that we are still trying and not having any luck. And this is what she wrote back…mind you…she has NO clue about any of this stuff. She and her husband have been married less than two years and are not TTC. Although, for some reason they have already researched IVF clinics, and it is mostly her husband that is doing the research. He has been married before, and he didn’t have any kids, so I am assuming that he already knows that he has a sperm problem. Why else would a guy be researching IVF clinics before even trying on their own? It sounds a little fishy to me.
Anyway, here is her e-mail:
“I am so sorry you are down about getting pregnant. This probably isn’t going to be much help, but in the celebrity magazines I keep reading how certain celebs try 2, 3 sometimes 4 times before it happens –and even some give up and then presto, it happens on it’s own. Stress is such a big factor. Also, I hope your place has a good track record cuz’ M keeps telling me about this place he found in the Peninsula that ‘guarantees’ you will get pregnant. Let me know if you want the info. I’m sure you’ve already read every book on the planet, but I read somewhere it also depends what you eat that day/week -something about changing the chemistry in the uterus. Seems to me they are implanting you with fertilized embryos, so I would think it’s some slight chemical imbalance down there that needs to be worked out. What do they tell you?”
THANKS for the advice Dr. C! Yes, it must be some slight chemical imbalance “down there” that needs to be worked out. I never thought of that, and neither did my doctors!!! I should probably eat something different on the day of my embryo transfer. OMG could she add anything else annoying into this e-mail? At least she didn’t say, “Just adopt!” I wrote her a RANT back, she probably will never speak to me again, but I just wasn’t in the mood for her blathering!
On another note, my friend that blew me off on Sunday wrote me an e-mail. I didn’t make any contact. She apologized about backing out and explained how exhausted she was because she worked two nights until 8pm and for about 5 hours on Saturday, and she was feeling overwhelmed and not enthused about coming to the event that she promised to come to and help with. I haven’t responded, I am leaving her hanging for a bit longer. I know that is a petty way to behave, but I feel petty right now. I will forgive her, but I have to be in the right mood to talk to her. My thing is that I was WAY more tired and she was, I had to be. I had worked until 10pm for the whole week, all day Saturday and by the time she flaked on me, I had already worked 6 hours on Sunday, and I had to work on Monday too. So hearing that she was too tired didn’t help her case. I know I am being harsh, but I just don’t have the energy to deal right now. I will probably contact her in a couple of days. Thanks for all your support on this one!!