Women’s Health Conference

Yesterday I spent the whole day at a Women’s Health Conference. I was a little worried that it would be lame, but WOW was I completely (and pleasantly surprised). The highlight was that I got Peggy Orenstein’s book “Waiting for Daisy” signed, Peggy was the first speaker. She was amazing. There were so many amazing women — each of the five speakers were dynamic and awe inspiring. They even served us breakfast and lunch! Not bad for $25.

The hard part was that the assumption was that each of the women attending the conference already had kids; there was a lot of talk about being a mother, raising children, “empty nest syndrome”, etc. I went with my girlfriend that has a 15 year old. It is funny though — I know my friend loves her daughter more than anything and at times, I am envious. But I would not switch lives with her for a million dollars. She got pregnant right after highschool and never got a college degree. This is a real hindrance for job searching so she has never advanced the way she would like to. Her ex husband is an asshole to her, but let’s their daughter do whatever she wants. He is WAY behind in child support too. But now the daughter has decided it is “more fun” to be with daddy so she has moved out of my friend’s house and only visits on the weekend. And the dad agreed, most likely so he wouldn’t have to pay child support anymore. My friend and her daughter were getting in horrible fights about school work and grades. To top it all off, my friend was engaged to this guy and they are living together, but they  broke up. However, they still live together because she cannot afford the deposit and first month’s rent on a new place until the lease is up (the end of May). So she has been living with her ex-boyfriend for the last 5 months! What a nightmare. So — yes, I am envious that she has a daughter. But the rest of her life? No thanks.

I know I preach to myself all the time, that I have a GOOD life. And it is true. And I hope to add a baby to this good life that I have. But if I can’t, then I will have to make sure I stay thankful. Because things could be a whole lot worse.

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7 Responses to “Women’s Health Conference”

  1. Pamela Jeanne Says:

    Sometimes it’s the ability to look into the lives of others that allows me to appreciate that while I’m still trying to make sense of how and why things turned out the way they did, my life has many great aspects I wouldn’t ever want to lose. Glad you got to meet Peggy. I read her book and really appreciated her honesty. Ciao. (the plane is now boarding!)

  2. docgrumbles Says:

    I am so jealous you met Peggy! I loved that book – read it during my second m/c and I sooooo needed to read it right at that time.

  3. Lizzy Says:

    We all have our “things” in life. It’s as easy to pity someone else as it is to envy them. Somehow, in many ways, it actually does seem to balance out. It’s just really tough to look at one’s own life and think about where we are now compared to our ideal. Not many people live the ideal they set up for themselves 20 years ago. It seems the longer time passes, the further we stray from those ideal lifestyles we envisioned for ourselves in our youth.

  4. Swim Says:

    I’m glad I read your post tonight. I sat on a train today thinking of why I’m so unlucky in trying to get pregnant. I know I’m lucky in so many other ways so I feel guilty feeling sorry for myself. I stuggle with IF but I can’t dwell on what I don’t have but try and focus on what I do have, a wonderful handsome husband, a good career and close friends that I have had for a long time.

  5. Rebecca Says:

    I feel like I could have written your post myself. Sometimes I get envious of my brother that he has three beautiful children and how desperately I want children, but his life is far from perfect or happy. We have our partners and our health, and eventually the children will come. I know they will xxx

  6. Ashley Bass Says:

    I just wanted to stop by and say hey. You are in my thoughts! I am sorry I have been slacking on comments lately.

  7. Freyja Says:

    Amen Sister!

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