10dp1dt

I have never tested at home after IVF. I am SO tempted, but I am not going to do it. I just think it is a bad idea. I don’t trust those pee sticks as far as I can throw them. I have lasted this long…I can do it, right? Anyway, I gave away all my pee sticks to my acupuncturist, so I would have to go out and buy some. Which I am NOT going to do. TW is so convinced I am preggo, it is hard not to believe him. Yesterday we went next door to check out the progress on the house, and we went into the little room that will be the nursery (should we ever need one). It is going to be painted this really nice, warm, buttery yellow color called “Full Sun”. I figured that it is a pretty gender neutral color, and we can accent it with blue or pink, and if it ends up not being a nursery, it will still be a really nice color…ANYWAY, TW kept saying that the nursery will be nice, but that the “babies” will sleep with us in our room (he thinks I am going to have twins). I think that his enthusiasm is sweet and it is hard not to get caught up in it…but I also know that there is a very good chance that this IVF didn’t work. I am trying to just take it one day at a time. It is so hard. Of course, TW isn’t even going to be in town on the 9th – beta day. He wasn’t here for ER, ET and now he won’t be here on beta day. How convenient!

I keep staring at my chest. I lift up my shirt and stare in the mirror, looking for signs that my boobs are changing. I don’t even know if this would happen so early…I am being really silly. My chest seems more vein-y to me…but I could just be imagining it. I noticed two big veins on my chest, not on my boobs but on my chest area below my collar bone, running towards my boob. And there is also a little purple vein on my left boobie that hasn’t been there before. My boobs are SUPER sore, but I know that all of this could be part of the progesterone supplements. Ugh. I wish I didn’t even write about it b/c it sounds SO ridiculous when I reread this paragraph.

I just need to distract myself. Easier said than done! The good news is that the landscaper, after I spoke with him, agreed to do the whole front of the house, plus grading and drainage around the whole property — following our landscape plans — for the price we wanted!!! I am SO thrilled. We are going to do the backyard next year, but the front of the house is going to be GORGEOUS. He wants me to draw up a proposal detailing everything that will be included and we are all going to sign it on Monday. He started today with a huge Bob.Cat. If nothing else, I am going to be living in my DREAM house in less than 2 months.

I am watching the WORST movie right now, on TV. It is called “The Breed” – it is a Wes Craven flick. It is about a pack of genetically altered wild dogs that terrorize a group of college kids that come to this island getaway for the weekend. It is such a bad movie. The dogs are all German Shepherd looking, and some maybe Belgian Malinois. The scary part: My Sutter looks just like these crazy rabid dogs! I was at the park today and this lady was there with her little Sheltie. She took one look at my dog, and basically said he was scary looking and left. Hmmmph. I think my dog is beautiful. Maybe he does look a little satanic but I love him. You be the judge. The first one was the week I got him. The second one is how he looks now.

Three more days and a wake up, and I will have the answer. Fingers crossed.