Random stuff

I have been reading this blog non-stop for two days. I started at the very, very beginning. And I can’t stop reading. My friend saw the blogger interviewed on a TV show and told me about it. She has a terrible potty mouth and some of the things she says on her posts are shockingly funny. She is a more extreme version of me,  I think. I wish I had the guts to put it all out there like that!

I have a new favorite cocktail….I mix pomegranate juice, odwalla lime-ade and vodka. I had two of them last night, for no reason. It was hot in the house and I should have just had the drink sans vodka, but why? I could drink 5 of them but then I would have a real problem.

Last night TW made chocolate chip cookies. I am supposed to be dieting (except I allow myself cocktails instead of bread) and I wasn’t going to have any. But then he brought out the freshly made cookies (well he “makes” them by breaking the store-bought cookie dough squares apart and popping them in the oven for 12 minutes). I took a look at those damn, steamy cookies, with the gooey oozing chocolate, and something came over me. I became COOKIE MONSTER, I think I even sprouted the blue fur and I got big googley eyes. I am not kidding. These cookies were scalding hot, and I took THREE of them and put them all in my mouth at the same time. And I burned my tongue. I was laughing hysterically and practically choking, and I couldn’t swallow because the cookie formed a big ball of cookie glue in my mouth. You should have seen the looks of horror on PT and TW’s faces! Even the dog ran out of the room and hid.

I have been having sex dreams every night. Sex dreams with TW. We haven’t had real sex in a LONG time. I don’t know why.  It is like neither of us has the energy. It is sad. Sad. Sad. Sad. Every day I think I will attack him and then night comes and I have my two cocktails and 18,000 cookies and I don’t feel like it anymore. Gee, I wonder why?


5 Responses to “Random stuff”

  1. Kenna Says:

    I read the dooce blog every day. I’m from Utah and live here, and Heather Armstrong lives here too. I just bought her book and I am going to meet her in June. She does have guts, which is why I like reading too. She says the things I can’t say.

  2. Babychaser Says:

    I thought I loved her right off. Then I saw the “used to be Mormon” stuff and loved her even more. (Are there many of us out there?)

    Anyway, thanks. I never would have checked her out if you hadn’t mentioned her, and she’s fantastic.

  3. Allison Says:

    OMG, I love Dooce. That blog is totally addicting. Today’s entry is particularly priceless – especially if you have a dog. But even aside from that, your Cookie Monster analogy made me laugh given the “muppet sex” bit…

  4. Freyja Says:

    Yeah sometimes I look at Zeno and think how hot he is and then by the time I’ve finished my two pomegranate martinis (almost the same recipie) I’m just too sluggish. He also used to be kind of mean about wanting to when I’ve had anything to drink but I may have just broken him of that (finally).

    *** off to check out the blog ***

  5. Pamela Jeanne Says:

    No way!…this weekend I was trying to use stuff up on in the fridge (contractor bids coming next week) and found Absolut Vodka in the freezer. I mixed up some Pomegranate and Cran-rasberry juice. DELISH!

    Then I discovered some Nestle’s cookie dough squares in the back of the fridge (the date was still good) so I popped ’em in the oven. I must have been channeling you!

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