IF is everywhere (UPDATED)

 ***Missed Conceptions got a BFP this weekend! Please stop by and give her some love. She is nervous and needs all the support she can get!***
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Last night I was folding laundry and turned the tube on. They had an L.A. Ink Marathon going on TLC. I don’t know why, but I love that show! I don’t have a tatoo either. I used to dabble with the idea. The closest I got was about 10 years ago when my brother was visiting….it was about midnight and we were drunk and decided to get tatoos. We went to the closest place and although the doors were open, they closed at 11:30. So we went home and I never came close again.

Anyway, if you haven’t seen the show they usually have a short bio/interview with some of the clients that are getting tattoos. They talk about why they want the tattoo, what it symbolizes, etc. Usually the stories are pretty compelling. Yesterday I actually cried (yes, okay, I am doing that a lot lately).

There was the woman on the show, she looked to be in her early 40s or so. She was pretty, but looked like she had a hard life. Her husband looked TOUGH. At first I thought it would be a typical story — like wanting the wedding vows tattoed on her back (lots of those on this show!). But no. She talked about her four and a half year struggle with infertility. She said so may things that we all know all too well: that becoming a mother is such a natural thing. That she never thought about the possibility that it wouldn’t happen. That they both went through tests, she had multiple surgeries and treatments, her husband did as well, and they were diagnosed with our favorite: unexplained IF. They finally adopted a baby boy and she calls him Buddha as a nickname….she had a Buddha baby tattoed on the side of her lower leg. It was an adorable tattoo of a smiling baby in a Buddha pose, holding a baby blanket around himself. She said that giving birth doesn’t make you a mother, loving a child makes you a mother.

Then there was this guy, probably in his early 30s, who lost his daughter. She had a birth defect and never grew past 7 pounds, so she was like a tiny baby even though she was older. I think she was 5 when she died (I missed how old she was when she died but she was definitely a small child). He got a tattoo of her image. It was so sad hearing him talk about his sweet baby girl. He said that time doesn’t heal him, it makes it easier to talk about, but he will never be healed. It made me wonder how I would handle it if my future child had a severe birth defect. I know I have to think about these things, because I am 38 years old and it is certainly a possibility.

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8 Responses to “IF is everywhere (UPDATED)”

  1. kona Says:

    That sounds very touching. I have never seen the show.

  2. Trace Says:

    TLC sucks me in. So does Discovery Health and the regular Discovery channel because it has The Baby Story, and the Adoption Story, and a few others. I had to stop watching them because I would find myself bawling in the family room. Anyway, I took a few Jodi Piccoult books out of the library. This is the third one I have read by this author, and they all have mentioned infertility in some way. Last year I read a book by Harlen Coben, yup, it was a mystery that ended up being about adoption. The list goes on and on… It does seem to slip into day to day life in such a sly way.

  3. Brian Says:

    L.A. Ink and Miami Ink are both wonderful shows though I don’t care for how they did L.A. Ink, it just seems a little too tacky. People get tats sometimes for all the wrong reasons or they get them without thinking how it’ll look when they’re 75 and realized, “what the hell was I thinking getting ‘death to all’ plastered on my forearm.” The stories that are truly heartfelt make a lot of sense and I see why they do it. I’m just trying to get up enough courage and determination to get one for myself.

  4. Yodasmistress Says:

    The father of my sister’s kids we refer to euphemistically as the Sperm Donor (yes, that IS a euphemism, there are MANY, MANY other things I would like to call him). Anyway, this guy is living proof that genetics do not a parent make.

  5. sarasp Says:

    It does become clear how common it is once people actually get started talking about it.

  6. Rebecca Says:

    I feel like I just saw that show from your description of it – it sounds unbelieveable. I need to get into it. Meanwhile, I just joined the barren bitches book tour at http://stirrup-queens.blogspot.com/ and I loved it. You should definitely join for the next book.

  7. Michelle Says:

    I have never seen it- now I want to!

  8. Chris Says:

    Lately I can’t watch TV at all without crying . . . and I hate that!

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